Nuts (or Hay 1 - London nil)

My young man has got himself a second hand double bed. Being second hand, not all the essential bits were there when he tried to re-build it. Specifically, the nuts he had wouldn't fit on the bolts.
So he went to a few hardware shops in London. No luck.
In desperation, he sent one of the bolts up to me in Hay.
I went to Walter Jones, and they had the right width of nut, but the thread wasn't right, so they wouldn't fit on.
So I trundled Islay down to Williams' in her trolley (when I lifted her out, she managed to find the only mat in the place to lie down on - and it was in the best place for anyone coming in and out to give her fuss!). The man behind the counter disappeared for about five minutes - and came back with all the nuts I needed! The price was a grand total of 38p! It seems that the thread on the bolts was Imperial rather than metric (how old is this bed, anyway?)
When I phoned the young man up to say the nuts were on the way, his response was:
(Imagine a Burt Kwouk voice here) "Well done, Lin Chung - you have stolen the Imperial nuts from the unspeakable Kau Chu, and soon the warriors of Lian Shan Po will no longer have to sleep on the floor!"